This is a Really Crappy Blog Post

We're about to get really crappy here.

Yesterday, I discovered several piles of dog poop in the yard on the side of our house that hits the street. It's only been 2-3 weeks the last time we mowed our lawn weeds, and none of this was here. Where is this  coming from? We don't own a dog, and Todd the bunny would have to be at least 5 times his size to create something that... substantial.

It's NOT cute.

Sure, sometimes you leave the house and forget to bring a plastic bag to clean up. And then you secretly hope that nobody saw you and walk off casually, right? We've all been there. And I like to believe, unlike this person, that dog owners carry plastic bags so they can clean up every time... not just to put on the big poop-picking show when they know they've been spotted.


Accidents and oversights happen. Ever since we moved in 2 years ago, I would find a happy little stray turd in our yard and ignored it because it would eventually disintegrate and go away. I understand that when you live on the corner, there's more yard to manage, and double the chances for this to happen. Except here's why I'm completely annoyed:

Count it. That's TEN piles. You don't forget to clean up ten times in three weeks. It's been so hot and dry that it's just baking and preserving the evidence: ten identical piles of poop = clearly from the same dog. I don't hold this against the dog. Everyone poops. I do, however, have a problem with the owner.


Not a coincidence*: A quick check of the front of our yard found nothing. The same sweep of our behind-neighbor's yard also found nothing (except an old pile of poo that's obviously from a different dog). It seems to me that the lack of big windows on the side of our house makes this owner feel ok about letting his/her dog relieve itself on the side of our house without cleaning up.


* We're not bad neighbors! Of course, when you find that someone's vandalized or done something to your house and yard, it makes you wonder if you've done something to deserve it. I cannot think of a thing. Maybe it's like Mark & Miranda's story a few years ago, when they found this hilarious, poorly-written, passive-aggressive note in their mailbox all because they didn't mow their lawn.

I showed Ben what I found, and we had a good time dreaming up several (some funny, some wish-we-had-the-guts-to-do-this) responses to the poop.

The cute approach
The cuteness of this garden statue-esque "clean up after your dog" sign distracts from the point. Must get message across less daintily!

The direct sign approach
This sign is more direct about telling owners to pick up after their dogs. But not only is this ugly, I feel like this would only be asking for people to let their dogs go in our yard. It's clear on what you want to accomplish by placing the sign, so I'll give it that much.

And this is a similar version of the direct-but-totally-tacky sign (and arguably still not a deterrent but an invitation):

The passive aggressive approach
Gather it up, and put it all in the middle of a heavily-traveled sidewalk. Not the best idea. I'm not quite ready for the rest of the neighborhood to hate us. And I really won't be surprised to find a flaming bag of poop on our doorstep if we do do it... (haha, get it?)

The even more passive aggressive approach
Use utility flags (we already own some for race management) to "raise awareness" of the issue - raise the owner's awareness that we know! Flag each pile of poop. Since there are ten, it would be insane! There are probably neighborhood rules against this anyhow. Photoshop preview:

What We Actually Did
My sister set up a motion-detector video camera last year when she was trying to figure out which of her two cats was secretly peeing in the house when she wasn't around. And it worked! She could monitor the video feed remotely on a cell phone, on the internet, and set it to motion-activate... all with a cheap D-Link wireless camera and an accessible internet connection.

I like this approach much better. I'd MUCH rather figure out who's allowing their dog to do this and catch them in the act. Once I know who it is, I have zero problem with confronting them face-to-face.

Last night, we set up a video camera from our upper balcony and recorded all evening. We used a plain old handheld video camera plugged into the charger and zip-tied the tripod to the railing, setting it up at an angle with a good view of the sidewalk, treelawn, and the side of the yard. There was also no need to conceal the camera itself because most people don't look up as they're walking by. The outdoor curtains seem to hide the equipment anyway. While we have the house's built-in video cameras pre-installed and weather-proofed, they're unfortunately not set up to record - YET. And we're really not that paranoid, either. (Although that would've been helpful last year when a bunch of houses in the neighborhood, including ours, got shot up in a drive-by with paintballs. Oh... the privileges of living on the corner!)

We made a decision to record only for 4-6 hours each morning and 4-6 hours in the evenings; during the day, it has been getting way too hot out, and I don't want to overheat or damage the camera by leaving it out in the sun or in 100+ degree weather. Based on the current drought we're having, I'm pretty sure I don't have to worry about rain!

 

We don't know a lot, but the evidence that was left gives us a short profile of our "poop"etrator (pun credit: Ben) with:

It's not certain, but could guess that our careless dog owner is a person who lives in the apartments behind our neighborhood. The side/back of our house leads only to the apartment buildings (as opposed to other single-family homes), and an apartment-dweller would be more likely to be less considerate of homeowners' yards. You know... I won't poop in your yard if you don't poop in mine!


Ben did research and found that the City of Bloomington issues up to a $50 citation for every instance in which a dog owner does not clean up after his/her dog on someone else's property. Enforceable? Probably not. But now there's $500 sitting on our lawn!


What We Saw So Far
After surveillance day #1, we've seen only me and a family of 3 (dog-less one at that) on camera. It's been so hot out that I don't expect to capture our lazy owner on video for another week until it cools down and people are actually going out on walks with their pets.

This is the morning of Day 2, the forecast is out to exceed 104 or 106 degrees F today, so it's the same old hotness that's keeping people - and possibly our poopetrator - indoors. We set up the camera at 6:30am (Sadly, we've been up 6am or earlier the past week anyway, just because it's the only way to still run and beat the heat). We recorded until about 10am today, catching nothing but:

• a guy walking to see what some debris in the road was
• a runner trying to beat the heat
• a person (coming from the direction of the apartments!!) walking a reasonably large dog off-leash. Suspect. Marking as a person of interest.

I'll extract some video clips for next time so you can see what it looks like when we're monitoring our place.

Honestly, it's all kind of fun/funny. Maybe because of all of this FBI talk lately. :) But it's still annoying and I don't appreciate piles of feces on my grass (dead or not). So yeah, I want to catch this person, and we're entertaining ourselves doing it all the while!

So neighbors and dog owners, please let this be a reminder to

clean up after your dogs...

Or else!

Meanwhile, I'll keep you posted on what we end up catching on camera... I have a feeling we're about to see some funny crap.